How To Be Confident At Any Age Through Personal Congruency

I remember when I was in my early twenties, heck,but in the end it's people playing people and Magic
it was only a few birthdays ago (I'm 26 now).stars were stars because they had done two things
Flashback about five years and I was a fresh out of- they worked really hard at what they did because
university nobody with a degree in businessthey loved it and they had experience from winning
management that I just scraped a GPA 4 in (this isand loosing a lot of matches.How to be confident at
equivalent to a pass in Australia, university grades areany ageIf the myself of now sat down with myself
1-7, 4 being a pass, 7 being the best). I spent mostat 21 and tried to explain the secret to becoming
of my university days lost. Half the time doing what Iconfident and attaining success I probably would
needed to get through my degree, the other half ofhave a lot of trouble getting through to him. It's hard
the time indulging in whatever hobby took myto be a believer without experience and in hindsight
interest. Throw in some tennis, a handful of casualfaith is a lot easier, but I'll do my best to help along all
jobs and lots and lots of glossy-eyed staring at thethose other people struggling to have faith in
beautiful girls on campus and you had my life atthemself.There is only one thing you need to
university.It's not a period that I would want to gounderstand, and in fact this is more a faith based
through again because it was full of growthdecision about your future more than it is a tangible
experiences and as usual growth is painful. Girls, jobtruth if you are young and/or inexperienced.Your
interviews, difficult subjects, forced studying ofsuccess will be determined by your personal
materials I had no interest in whatsoever, failure andcongruency,
success made me generally uncomfortable andyour courage of conviction and faith in your own
unsure of myself for a lot of the time. It all endedabilities.If you don't have experience, you are young
and I came out of it alive, perhaps a little jaded, aand just starting out in life, you don't have a history
little bitter, and of course a whole lot lost. No doubtof events to draw conclusions from. Books, videos,
not that unusual for someone in their earlypodcasts and education in general are a good starting
twenties.Don't get me wrong, it was a period of lifepoint but you will never have success, you will never
my life that I'm glad I went through, I needed toget true confidence in yourself without experience,
grow as a person. It wasn't always comfortable butwithout taking actions and learning from the
it taught me a lot and throughout that period myoutcomes.The beauty of experience is that it comes
confidence slowly blossomed with each newfrom both success and failure. While one makes you
experience. As I've grown past the confusing earlyfeel great and the other makes you feel lousy, the
twenties I've realised more and more how vitalend result is still experience and a new framework of
confidence is, how a person's congruency withperception you can apply to your future life. This is
themself is the most important building block for awhat experience is. This is what you draw on to
successful life.Where does confidence comecreate success and this is the essence of your
from?Reading about, listening to and watching thepersonal congruency.In many ways I'm very
most successful people, no matter what fields theysuccessful right now. In many other ways I'm far
are excelling in, makes you feel that these people arefrom it. I'm not a millionaire, in fact I have very few
special. Something about them makes them differentassets at all. For now lets avoid a discussion of the
from everyone else and you may even go as far asdeterminants of life success and I'll simply state that I
ruling yourself out of achieving similar successhave a hell of a lot more I want to achieve and I bet
because you believe that, for whatever reason, be ityou do too.Have faith in the power of
luck, genetics, personality or upbringing, somethingexperienceEach setback in my life was usually
about really truly successful people makes thembrought upon by a lack of patience, a desire to
different from you. It's as if these people are specialbecome something else and achieve something
and you can not be like them because you lackquickly (life's version of the get rich quick scheme).
whatever magic ingredient they have.To makeDuring the major catastrophes in life I accused the
yourself feel better and gain education you readworld of the usual atrocities, that life was singling me
books and study the materials written about theout to suffer, that I had somehow been selected as
special people so you can emulate them and bea victim and that it just wasn't fair. Each new painful
special too. You read the habits of highly successfulexperience in life brings about similar feelings and
people. You follow goal setting guides, motivationaldespite my intellectual understanding of reality it
mantras and build blocks to success. For some reasondoesn't make the pain less painful.Your ability to
it doesn't work for you, further cementing yourbounce back, to turn the frown upside down, to
opinion that really successful people are special andleverage failure to create success and find
different and you can't replicate that magic purelyopportunities in the remnants of breakdown is a
through study, self discipline and by following roadlifeskill of tremendous value. Don't let your feelings of
maps. You just weren't born to be successful, youconfusion and loss make you depressed. Leaving
were born to struggle.Famous and successful peopleschool, finishing university or quitting (or being fired
are just peopleIn 1998 I had the luck and skill tofrom) a job are opportunities that you rarely get in
qualify for the biggest event in the Magic: Thelife. These are powerful turning point moments that in
Gathering calendar, the World Championships, thatmost people's lives only happen rarely. Major change
year played in Seattle, USA. I had played well, wasis not a common occurrence for a typical human
lucky and made some smart choices at the Australianbeing so relish the opportunity when it comes along,
Nationals to land second place and a spot on thedon't drown in your supposed lack of identity.How to
Australian World Championship team. By this timedeal with confusionIf you are not sure what to do
Magic had become a big deal, with three million dollarswith your life dip your fingers into as many activities
distributed as prizes each year (first place at theas you can and follow those that make you happy
world Championships that year won $36,000(and no doubt will probably make you money too).
USD).The level of professionalism had increasedUse skills to build assets, don't trade labour for
greatly as a result and there were people playing themoney because it's not a good long term strategy.
game competitively for a full time living. Magic evenTrade your labour today for asset building for
had superstars, players you read about in magazines,tomorrow and start building passive income supports.
watched on ESPN and cheered for during live webIt will be hard work and it might seem that for many
coverage of the big events. In many ways a regularyears and months that you are making nothing (I
Magic player admired these superstars as specialknow I feel like that sometimes), but your future self
people, people that were very successful in life andwill thank you for it in the years to come.An empty
possessed a gift or some form of unique talent,slate should not make you sad, it's just space that's
much like a young golfer might admire Tiger Woodsready to be filled with your energy and ideas as you
or an entrepreneur might look at Richard Branson.Olletest yourself to see what works and makes you
Rade, a young guy from Sweden, enjoyedhappy. Have faith in the power of experience to
tremendous success at Magic, winning a Pro Tour andcreate personal congruency. Remember that other
at that point with lifetime earnings well over $50,000people are just like you, even the most famous,
USD and he wasn't even 20 yet. I really admired Olle.most successful people. They are not superheros
Then there was John Finkel, who back then wasblessed with magic powers. They simply choose to fill
known as the best Magic player with well overtheir lives with experiences, they grew from failures
$100,000 in career earnings. These guys wereand successes and eagerly jump into new activities
superstars, overachievers and in my mind sitting on awith vigour and passion. They have confidence
pedestal above everyone else.Heading to Seattle Ibecause they can refer back to the outcomes of
had my first chance to meet and play theseevents in their lives, they know how to deal with
superstars of Magic. I'm not one to gush oversituations so they are not afraid to try. Life rewards
celebrities but sometimes you can't help but feel athose people that take action, who don't follow the
little in awe of people you've read about in the media.crowd but rather follow their passions.Remember too
Since I knew so much about these famous playersthat life is not quick. It's a long ride. You want it to
and they knew nothing about me I felt I wasn't onbe that way right. Why be so eager to achieve
equal terms, I wasn't confident and in no way did Icertain things by tomorrow? What are you trying to
consider myself one of them.By the end of thebecome so quickly that you are creating frustration
tournament I was exhausted. The little sleep I gotand stress today. Persist in the activities that you
didn't help me play the best cards but the experiencehave motivation to work on over and over again,
I gained was amazing. During the tournament I playedand not just for weeks, but for months and years.
Olle Rade and I beat him. It was just like any otherBecome good at them and then great at them.
match and he was quite upset by the end of it,These are the skills you will develop because you
celebrities don't like losing either. I lost to some otherenjoy them. Eventually they will become your special
big names and during our non-playing periods enjoyedtalents that set you apart and you will be surprised
getting to know many famous players.By the end ofhow suddenly others look at you as if you are
the week I had completely changed as a Magicgifted.By Yaro Starak
player. Despite not performing well I left Seattle withyou interested in online marketing, Internet business,
confidence in myself as a player and a newblogs and podcasts? Are you sick of "gurus" trying to
perspective on celebrities. Every superstar Magicsell you the latest get rich quick online deal?Get
player I met was no different from me. Sure someeducated, it's the key to real online wealth.Download
had natural talents that I didn't, perhaps strongand read quality how-to articles and listen to podcast
mathematical abilities, but I had strengths in otheraudio files in mp3 - Visit my blog: Entrepreneur's
areas. Magic being a game of skill rewards those thatJourney.
practice and study, luck and natural ability play a part,